El Hiko
by evil will prevail
Summary: Hiko begins his own restuarant, but what happens when he's arrested for stealing--from his OWN RESTAURANT! (this is actually a Inuyasha-Rurouni Kenshin-Yu Yu Hakusho Crossover)


El-Hiko

Chapter 1

"The Beginning of the End"

Kaoru: so this is the new restaurant?

Inuyasha: looks cheap.

Kenshin: that it is! ^.^

Kagome: it's cheap?

Kenshin: oro? no... it is the restaurant.

Shippo: let's just go inside.

*all step inside*

Voice from behind them: Welcome to El-Hiko!

*They turn. They see Hiko.*

Hiko: Hello! Welcome to El-Hiko home of the El-ko burger.

Kenshin: oro.

Inuyasha: Yeeah. We wanna eat.

Hiko: Oh. At El-Hiko we always give what the cheater wants...

Kagome: *pats Inuyasha on back* This is just the place for you!

Inuyasha: Feh! That's not cheating! Kikyo is dead!

Kagome: Who said anything about Kikyo? *smirks*

Hiko: *hic!* Follow me, fiends... er, *cough* I mean, friends...

Everyone: o_o *follow him*

*walk to be seated*

Kenshin: orororororo... O_O

Hiko: like it? ^.^

Kenshin: orororororororororo.... O___O

Kaoru: Why does it say 'Sake is the Best' and 'Sake Rules' all over the place?

Hiko: El-Hiko wants everyone to be happy. El-Hiko serves you right, loud mouth.

Kaoru: O_O

Hiko: I'll be right back with your El-Hiko food.

Everyone: ¬ ¬ ok.

Inuyasha: This is a nice place.

Kagome: Covered in pottery head to toe.

Kenshin: Hiko is a potterer man.

*Hiko returns*

Hiko: El-Hiko enjoys having fiends...Er...friends...It's nice to see you again manslayer...

Kenshin:...

Hiko: I mean... sand player.

Everyone: Oo

Hiko: Oh! Look more guests! Be riiight back grass... *HIC!* I mean guests.

Everyone: Oo

Kagome: I think we should sit...

*THWAP!*

Kagome: Oops! Sorry!

Inuyasha: *muttering angrily under his breath*

Shippo: Hey, where're Miroku and Sang--

"AAAHHHH! GET AWAY!"

*WAK!*

Sango: *appears, running toward them* Perverted Monk!

Inuyasha: ¬ ¬ 

Kaoru: What happened?

Sango: Cornered me and tried to kiss me.

Kagome _again_?

*Miroku comes through door with slap mark on face*

Everyone: *stare*

Miroku: What? Life is short!

Yahiko: For you

Miroku: So?

Sango: Continue on like that and I'll make it even shorter. -.-

Miroku: O.O *sits and scoots as far away from Sango as possible. 

Kagome: you must've slapped him really hard... it's very unlike him to do something like that.

*waiter appears*

waiter: may i take your order?

Inuyasha: I want 500,000,000,000 glasses of water.

Kenshin: Green tea for me. ^.^

Everyone else: O.O

Waiter: anyone else for drinks?

Kagome: soda for me.

Shippo: apple juice

Kaoru: Milk.

Sano:...um...

Yahiko: coconut juice.

Sano: Hawaiian punch

Miroku: Ramen!

Everyone: Oo

Miroku: What? I drink it!

Waiter: Ok, that's one Green Tea, a soda, apple juice, coconut juice, Hawaiian punch, RAmen, and 500,000,000,000 glasses of water. Anything else?

*Crystal, Earendil, and Rurouni appear out of no where*

Crystal: Hoe come we weren't invited?!

Earendil: Sorry I'm late.

Crystal: you were invited?!

Rurouni: me too

Crystal: You were too?!......oh well, I'm heeerreee! ^______^

Inuyasha: Oh goody.

Waiter: What would you like?

Rurouni: Green tea.

Earendil: me also

Crystal: SUGAR!

Earendil: Don't you think you've had enough?

Crystal: no.

Waiter: anything _else_?

"sake"

Everyone turns around. Hiko is standing there.

Hiko: Actually, bring to or three... or four... or five jugs of sake.

Everyone: Oo

Waiter: ok, be back in a second... *walks away*

Kagome: So--

Waiter: Back.

Shippo: wow. When he said a second, he meant a second

Inuyasha: Where're the drinks?

Waiter: Well, i couldn't get them in a second, so i came to say: be back in 30 mins or so.

*walks away again*

Everyone: Oo

Hiko: Waiters at El-Hiko are always honest and give the best service.

Sano: rrrrriiiiiiiiggggghhhhht......

---30 min later

*waiter appears balancing a tray on his head, one on each hand, one on a knee, and hopping on one foot, a string tied around his waist that's connected to 12 carts of water behind him.*

Everyone: O_O

Waiter: Here are your drinks. I suggest you don't get your bladders too full. We only have one bathroom. *Walks away*

Sango: O.O Is that what waiters are supposed to say?

Kaoru: Er... I don't think so...

*All of a sudden, a random alarm turns on. Everyone but the gang, being the people they are, ran out of the store, screaming random things.*

Random Guy: HEEELLLPPP UUUUUSSSS!!!

R.Woman: AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

R. Kid: IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD!

R. Guy: CHICKEN!

Everyone: O_O

Yahiko: Isn't the alarm supposed to go off when there is an emergency? Where's the danger?

Rurouni: -.- *points to Hiko and Crystal* -------

Hiko: I'M DRUNK!

Crystal: I'M SUGAR-HIGH!

Yahiko: -.- oh. That explains everything. 

*Hiko and Crystal start dancing like Hobbits*

Rurouni: LOOK!! GENGHIS KHAN WRESTLING QUEEN NEFERTITI!

Everyone: *look away*

*Rurouni steals one of Inuyasha's 500,000,000,000 glasses of water, thinking he'll never notice*

Inuyasha: There's no Genghis Khan and -- OH MY GOD!!! SOMEONE STOLE ONE OF MY 500,000,000,000 GLASSES OF WATER!!! WAIT 'TIL I GET MY HANDS ON THEM!

Rurouni: O_____O

Earendil: Why did I see that coming?

Hiko: I'm DRUNK! I FEEL LIKE DOING SOMETHING CRAZY! *rungs up to unattended cash register* I SHALL _STEAL_ ALL THE MONEY FROM HERE!

Crystal: GO HIKO!

Inuyasha: WHERE'S MY GLASS OF WATER?!

Rurouni: *gulps water down.*

Earendil: *sips green tea*

Suddenly, police appears.

Police man: Mr.... Hiko! You're under arrest for stealing!

Everyone else: O.O........ *burst out laughing*

Hiko: I _own_ this restaurant! 

Police: The sign says El-Hiko, not Hiko.

Hiko: it's min, i tell you, MINE!

Police: thats what they all say. you're comin with us.

*police men take Hiko away*

Hiko: NOOOOO! I'M GUIL--INNOCENT! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO*gasp*OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

*police men drag Hiko out*

Inuyasha: anyways... Guess what? *his body tenses up*

Shippo: Uh oh...

Kagome: heh...heh...

Kenshin: What, dear friend, that you are. ^.^

Inuyasha: Kagome lost all the 34 shikon shards we gathered up _AGAIN_!

Kagome: ...........heh...........

Kenshin: ^.^.............

Crystal: LET'S PARTY!

Kenshin and Rurouni: oro?

Inuyasha: Feh.

Earendil: -.-......

Crystal is dancing on top of the table.

Yahiko: ARE WE GOING TO GET ANY FOOD?!

Sano: Guess no--

Sango: AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! 

*WAK!*

Kagome: How about if you ask her out instead?

Miroku: What? Life is short!

Yahiko: For you.

Miroku: So?

Sango: Continue on like that and I'll make it even shorter. -.-

Rurouni: Whoa... Dejavu.

Kaoru: Hey, look what I found. *she's holding a paper that's folded up with the words 'Hiko's Will' on the front*

Kenshin: I don't think--

Crystal: let's open it!

Rurouni: I don't think we should red it. It says to read it when he's 'long gone' and I quote. And he could be back at anytime.

Kenshin: Yes, i remember when he told me... *thought bubble pops up with Hiko saying 'Read when I'm long gone'.*

Rurouni: see? *points to thought bubble*

Shippo: Aw, who cares?

Sano: Yeah, just read it!

Yahiko: *opens paper* there's only one sentence: I wish for Kenshin, Kaoru, Yahiko, Sano, Inuyasha, Kagome, Shippo, Miroku, Sango, Rurouni, and Earendil to take care of my restaurant when I'm gone, and please KEEP CRYSTAL AWAY!

Earendil: at least it's concise and to the point.

Rurouni: I smell a plot!

Earendil: you became hyper in a hurry

Crystal: Hyper in a hurry! That rhymes!

Earendil: No it doesn't.

Crystal: .........oh well! I'll get it next time.

Earendil: no you won't

Kaoru: you're very concise and to the point.

Inuyasha: I like you, Earendil. You remind me of...

Jaken: *appears out of nowhere* Lord Sesshomaru! I've found them

Inuyasha: Never mind about the liking thing...

Kenshin: well..........oro?

Kagome: Hiko said for us to take care of the restaurant, so we should start with a make-over!

Sango: Yes, this place is--

Miroku: UGLY!

Sango: did you just call me ugly?

Miroku: huh? no, i called the restaurant--

Sango: Telling a girl you love her and then lying is bad, Miroku.

Miroku: oro?!

Kenshin and Rurouni: my line.

Kagome: these are such ugly colors! Hiko has such bad fashion sense! Where'd he get it from?

Everyone: *stare at Kenshin* _

Kenshin: Ororororo! Nani?

Everyone: 9_9 *whistling innocently*

*Kagome snaps her fingers. The room is magically turned all white, ready to be decorated. There are paint buckets in the corner.*

Kaoru: Look! There are enough paint buckets for every person in this room!

Crystal: I CLAIM THE RED ONE!

Earendil, Rurouni, Kenshin, Kurama: NOOOOOOO!

*Everyone above runs to the red bucket, which is sitting innocently in the corner. Mission Impossible music starts.*

*SLOOOOOWW MOTION!! (think action movie, like the matrix)*

Kenshin is almost to the bucket, but Earendil tackles him the other way. He turns amber-eyed. Earendil turns silver-eyed. Kenshin takes out his sakabato, and flips it over. Earendil takes out her sword. They start the swordfight of the century. 

Rurouni gets to the bucket and picks it up triumphantly. However, Kurama is right at her heels. He gets out his Rose Whip and uses it to snap the bucket out of Rurouni hand. Rurouni's fangs show up and takes out her sword. They face off, whip against sword. 

Crystal looks to her left, where Earendil and Kenshin are fighting. She looks to her right, where Rurouni and Kurama are fighting. Out of nowhere came reporters, photographers, and crazy fangs, with signs like "We ♥ Kurama!" etc.

Crystal looks to the front, where the red bucket stands glowing as if it was the very doors of heaven themselves. Her eyes turn violet in excitement. She rungs to the bucket, black and violet hair flowing proudly behind her. Trumpets come out of nowhere. A white light fills her vision, obscuring everything but the bucket. She's almost there! Faster and faster until she................ trips..........

Crystal: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

Ladybug Crystal tripped over: EEEEEEEEKKKK! SAAAAAVVEEEE MEEEEEEE!!!!

Jaken: Shame.

Inuyasha: Actually... I personally think the @?!* with it. 

Crystal: @_@

Kagome: *snaps her fingers* *room magically decorated*

Sano: What are you... a witch? OR THE GRIM REAPER!

Botan: ¬ ¬ I resent that remark. 

Kenshin and Earendil are still at it, not one of them tiring, but the fight between Rurouni and Kurama seems to be at its end. 

Rurouni traps Kurama, putting her sword around his throat. 

Rurouni: Give it up.

Kurama: never! *rose whip appears out of nowhere and hits Rurouni.*

Rurouni: -_^ NOO!

Inuyasha: This is actually getting pretty good. Why are we missing this? *takes out popcorn*

*Random movie chairs come of out nowhere. Everyone takes a seat and has popcorn, candy, and drinks. The room gets dark, except for the fights of Rurouni, Kurama, Kenshin, and Earendil... Crystal is on crutches on her arms and head.*

Crystal: _o excuse me... pardon... thanks... move, please... move, please... MOVE PLEASE!!! .... *hits person with crutch*... thank you...

Inuyasha: mmm... nice block... nice popcorn... mmm *_*

Crystal: move, Inuyasha. Or I'll hit you with my crutches.

Inuyasha: I dare you, baka

Crystal: -_- 

*5 min later*

*Crystal and Inuyasha are sitting at the farthest corners of the movie theatre/restaurant, glaring. Inuyasha has a few bandages and a black eye. Crystal is........ resembling a mummy.*

*Meanwhile*

Rin: No! I don't wanna! Please! Please! I don't want to go... There's a weird cat demon half human who is sugar high! Please!

Sesshomaru: ¬ ¬ Fine then. *walks away*

Rin: Oo WAIT LORD SESSHOMARU! JAKEN! WAIT! *runs after them* ^___^ I'll come!

*inside*

Inuyasha: *mutters* God, she's like 5 and she already has PMS.

*construction is heard across the street*

Everyone: ?????

*the four stop fighting*

Kurama: what...

Jin: the heck is that?!

*looks across the street*

Inuyasha: @!?#!

Kenshin: oro?!?

*across the street they see...

Sesshomaru: That's right. My restaurant.

Kagome: o_o.......

Everyone: O_o.........

Kenshin: Chicken Soup for the Demon's Soul?

Inuyasha: What kinda @!?#in name is THAT?!

Hiei: Hn. I saw that book.

*silence*

Hiei: Hn. It died not too long ago.

Kurama: _

Earendil: It's being rewritten.

Kaoru: By who?

Rurouni: Demons who're amongst us....

Earendil: *cough*

Kurama: *ACK!*

Hiei: Hnnn...

Rurouni: *cough.cough*

Botan: *cough*

Crystal: I see a pattern...

Hiei: Hnnn..

Crystal: *COUGH!*

Earendil: ¬ ¬ Why are you coughing half-breed?

All Demons: ¬ ¬

Crystal: O_O I felt left out? Heh.

Kenshin: ororororororo.....

Kaoru: O_O

Inuyasha: wait a minute..... what's wrong with half-breeds?

Yahiko: scared....... O_O

Sano: I had no idea we had so many demons among us.....

Kagome: me neither...

Earendil: This is boring... Let us...

All Humans: ¬____¬

Earendil: Heh.

Kurama: Is it me or is something burning?

All Humans/Half-Breeds/Shippo/Rurouni run to the kitchen.

Kagome: OH NO!

Earendil: ¬ ¬ Gullible 

*meanwhile*

Crystal: There's n--

Inuyasha: Where did they go? *Run back in to hell*

Shippo: THEY LEFT US!

Kagome: Stupid Demons!

Shippo: ¬ ¬

Kagome: ^.^ Not you Shippo...

Rurouni: Were you talking to me? *fangs appear and shine*

Kagome: Um............................ no? heh........

Rurouni: Better not be. You people bore me.

*Meanwhile*

Hiei: Nice place

Kurama: Nice. Indeed. *touches table nearby*

*Rin hits Kurama*

Kurama: Ow.

Sesshomaru: ¬ ¬ Don't touch.

Kurama: ¬ ¬ Fine.

Earendil: how stupid of us.

Hiei: what?

Earendil: We should've brought Rurouni along and... left her. *points to a jummping up and down Crystal*

Crystal: *singing* Funny funny, money money, funny money, money is FUNNY!

Hiei: hn.... I agree.

Earendil: Life goes on.

-----~-----End of Chapter-----~-----

Rurouni: Wow. I never thought that would end. 

Crystal: Yeah! We wrote that chapter for almost three days! 

Earendil: It's six pages front and back.

Rurouni: hai

Crystal: ^_^Well! That's the end of the story

Earendil: ¬ ¬ baka. just the chapter

Rurouni: ¬ ¬ not the story

Crystal: ^.^ Oh!

Rurouni and Earendil: *roll eyes* 

All three: Sayonara *Crystal a bit more.... actually much much much more energetically than the others.*


End file.
